'Dear God by Sarah McLachlan'

Dear God,Hope you got the letter and
I pray you can make it better down here.
I don't mean a big reduction in the price of beer
But all the people that you made in your image,
See them starving on their feet
'Cause they don't get enough to eat
From God
I can't believe in you.

Dear God,
Sorry to disturb you, but
I feel that I should be heard loud and clear.
We all need a big reduction in the amount of tears
And all the people that you made in your image,
See them fighting in the street
'Cause they can't make opinions meet

About God,
I can't believe in you

.Did you make disease, and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too?!

Dear God,Don't know if you noticed, but...
Your name is on a lot of quotes in this book,
Us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look,
And all the people that you made in your image,
Still believing that junk is true
Well I know it ain't, and so do you

Dear God,
I can't believe in...
I don't believe in...

I won't believe in heaven and hell.
No saints, no sinners, no devil as well.
No pearly gates, no thorny crown.
You're always letting us humans down.
The wars you bring, the babes you drown.
Those lost at sea and never found,
And it's the same the whole world 'round.
The hurt I see helps to compound
That Father, Son and Holy GhostIs
just somebody's unholy hoax
And if you're up there you'd perceive
That my heart's here upon my sleeve.

If there's one thing I don't believe in.....

It's you.....

Dear God.

two camels...

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

I've become so numb
I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all
I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

And every second I waste is more than I can take

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I knowI may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

I've become so numb
(Tired of being what you want me to be)
I've become so numb
(Tired of being what you want me to be)

-Linkin Park, Numb


i have tickets to see Dave Matthews Band on November 13th. mother is giving me shit about going, all stuff about taking care of corissa. and for once i am standing my ground, and i am going to this concert. this has put a huge wedge between the two of us. it might actually be, the straw that breaks these two camel's backs.

i'm not your child, i am your daughter, i am an adult, and you will treat me with the respect that i give you.

tightrope...

I'm losing you.......I'm losing you
Trust me on this one
I've got a bad feeling
Trust me on this one
You're going to throw it all away
With no hesitation

- The Moment I Said It, Imogen Heap


our friendship is fading. no matter what he or i may say.

stop pretending that when you mean isn't what you say

i know why i like this place so much. because i do not carry any of my baggage over from my other journals. here, i am not sick. i noticed i have not written about it once, and i love it. maybe it just makes me notice all the other things that bother me about my life, but at least it is something new, something away from what has consumed me for so long. i'm not epileptic, when i feel i am, i shut the computer off and keep this safe house.

signed,
ms. anonymous NJ

'Ride' by Cary brothers

You are everything I wanted
The scars of all I'll ever know

If I told you you were right
Would you take my hand tonight?
If I told you the reasons why
Would you leave your life and ride?

And ride…

You saw all my pieces broken
This darkness that I could never show

If I told you you were right
Would you take my hand tonight?
If I told you the reasons why
Would you leave your life and ride?
And ride…

i don't know why, but i am starting to like this place a lot more than Lj. maybe it is because it is so private. sometimes i worry that it will be run across, but then i remind myself that it is completely blocked off from other bloggers.it feels good to have a place that is completely my own, where i do not feel i am pressured to live up to others' expectations.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was on again yesterday, and even though i own the movie, i am compelled to watch it every time it is on television. i don't know what it is, i releate to Joel much more than i relate to Clem, although i do believe i embody her sense of freedom, her 'fuck it' attitude.

'Little Death' by +44

Please sleep, my darling, sleep
Your cry for inspiration
Never reaches ears on distant stars
And every night our lonely planet
Slides across the universe
And I won't pretend I understand

Please sleep, my darling, sleep
Your death by information
Won't disturb the peace on distant stars
And even when you lock the doors
And slide behind the unlit shades
None of us are strangers anymore

Fall asleep with the windows open
Come to me with the worst you've said and done
You'll close your eyes and see me
A little death makes life more meaningful
I stand no chance at all

Please, sleep my darling, sleep
Your car crash in slow motion
Won't upset the pace on distant stars
And one by one the years of our lives
Stumble as the moments pass
So please hold on, so please hold on

So fall asleep with the windows open
Come to me with the worst you've said and done
You'll close your eyes and see me
A little death makes life more meaningful
I stand no chance at all

Please, sleep my darling, sleep
Please, sleep my darling, sleep

So fall asleep with the windows open
Come to me with the worst you've said and done
You'll close your eyes and see me
A little death makes life more meaningful
I stand no chance at all